Desperate Times

A part of the Comey testimony has revealed what, quite honestly, may be one of the most desperate and tragi-comic episodes in this administrations desperate and tragi-comic history. The WH sends Gonzales and Card to 'heavy' or confuse Ashcroft, fresh out of surgery and still in the fog of a general anaesthetic, into signing a continuation statement for the warrantless wiretapping program that he and his assistant had already deemed illegal and had refused to sign. Luckily, both Comey and FBI Director Meuller (?) were on to this dastardly plan and had made damn sure there would be witnesses and a confrontation.

Gonzales and Card (Stan & Ollie) back off under duress but Card, petulantly, summons Comey to his turf later for a good dressing down.

Although this is really serious stuff (Glenn can fill you in on what this administration was/is up to and what it means to our country and our constitution) it begs the questions;

1) Are Stan & Ollie the best people to be sending on sensative missions like this?
2) If Comey and the FBI were not there, could Mrs. Ashcroft have kicked Stan & Ollie's butts?
3) Say Stan & Ollie had overcome the powerful but no longer in her prime Mrs. A, could they have found a pen?
4) Having found a pen, would they have remembered to bring the document?
5) Alright, say they had a pen and the document, would they have been able to revive Ashcroft?
6) Would they have been able to tell if Ashcroft were revived?
7) If a revived Ashcroft still refused to sign the document, did they have a Plan B?
8) Were Stan & Ollie authorized to 'waterboard' or use other authorized and approved means of persuasion if the AG showed signs of non-cooperation?
9) Having failed in their perverse attempt at coersion and cover-up, were these malingerers chastised and denounced?
10) What,if any, positions within the administration do these two incompetents now hold?

(Look, I'm sorry for using the names of two comedic giants as a foil for my useless attempt at humor... I was going to use Burke and Hare because of the obvious grave robber aspects of this despicable episode but I just see Stan's 'smiley' face everytime I think of Gonzo.)